Is ignorance bliss?

Hey guys! So it has been a while since my last post and you the ‘reader’ probably hadn’t even noticed or perhaps reading this now thinking “who does this guy think he is? Shakespeare or something?”. Anyway I’ve been thinking about this subject for a while and didn’t want to write some soppy post about true love and all that bullcrap but found that from my experiences from relationships and love I have noticed a quite a few things about myself and in people.

So where on to start? I guess falling in love for some people may be different to others but most people will say that when they first saw (or first really saw) the person their heart started to beat fast, their hands started to sweat and perhaps they even became speechless. I think its almost imperative to note that this kind of love is amazingly intense and powerful but with that comes a great deal risk. You see if this feeling happens before you have even had the chance to converse with this radiant woman you are in the position of utter blind love without any other logical components in the mix.

Now I’m not saying that this is true for every situation like this but lets say on average its generally not a good idea to become utterly in-love with a person you don’t really know e.g. young teenage girls in love with One Direction or Justin Bieber. Yes it may be romantic and “like the movies” to fall in love at first sight but in the end reality has a surefire way of slapping you in the face with stuff like this. With these emotions, ideas start to form about this person and a certain image of this person is painted out (in your head). This image is basically your interpretation of this person which up to know you have filled with many amazing and perfect things to make this person an image of perfection.

So what happens later on in your relationship with this person? Well if I’m completely infatuated with a concept in my environment then if I come across any new information that could shatter this concept and my perfect world what is the natural human reaction? Suppression! Yes it is true, look at your life and think about all those moments in your life that you think completely different about now opposed to the mind set you had during that moment. You’ll realise that there are times where we found out numerous bits of information that could crack and shatter our perfect ignorance on a matter but instead of accepting it we tend to put the information to one side and carry it round with you. This sort of suppression can be seen in so many people’s life whether it be in work where you may suppress any crazy ideas of going traveling or changing careers or in love where there are occurrences that tell you that you are not right for each but all these occurrences and informative events are suppressed by some sort of human defensive mechanism that allows us to keep on living that ignorant life.

But hey, don’t get me wrong I’m not such a pessimist to believe that this happens to all people madly in love as that’s simply not true. I guess I’m just trying to share some of my experience which is to simply look at what your body is telling you. More times than not your sub-conscience will try to tell you something, all you have to do is listen. In my case, believe it or not, I started to get such intense pain in my right side of my face in the last month of two of my intense relationship. At first I thought it was some kind of nasty disease I caught from those dirty London underground tubes and buses. But later on I found it was because some parts of the day and the night I had been tensing my entire jaw and grinding my teeth due to this unbelievable amount of suppressed stress. My body had been screaming out to me that was something was wrong, I just had simply chose to ignore it.

A great quote from the Matrix movie that I think applies well to this topic is when the character Cypher wished to be re-plugged back into the Matrix as I now that he has seen reality he wishes to go back to his ‘fake’ and artificial life back in the Matrix:

… Ignorance is bliss.

That we as a human species have a lot of physiological mechanisms that we use on a daily basis to get through our lives. Wow… that sounds very profound but It is extremely true and think it is imperative that we should always question our actions and these mechanisms as they may not do what is especially the best for us.

As for me and my broken heart, well the only thing you can do is take it as an experience and learn from it. The annoying thing is that the experiences and events that you learn from the most in your life are (most of the time) the bad ones.

So I guess in conclusion what I’m really trying to say is that “Bitches be crazy“…

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The grass is always greener…

I think it’s safe to say that nearly everyone who can string two English words together has come across the saying:

The grass always looks greener on the other side



Which can be filtered down to the simple explanation: that you always want what you don’t have even if what you have is pretty great. Now don’t worry I’m not blogging all this to give a wonderful insight into the wonderful world of English sayings but more to explain that when you actually stop and look around you may find that this saying becomes quite apparent in your day-to-day life.

Don’t believe me? Think your life is perfect and you don’t want anything to change? If so then you’re simply not human or some kind of Buddhist monk.

But really let’s look at a simple life activity as normal as work (which accounts for around 62% of days in a year… yes I calculated it, I’m that sad…). Now obviously I could apply this quote in a billion different ways which would probably all contradict each other and result in the world imploding into a big pile of goo… BUT I’m trying to make a point here so before you start writing an intellectually self-inflating comment about how you’ve so cleverly found a counter-point to all my arguments, stop what your doing, write it all down on a piece of paper and send it me via your rubbish bin.

Anyway… where was I? Ah yes, work! I find after experiencing the ‘real world’ of the whole 9-5, moronic bosses and the conveyor-belt amounts of work, that many people in this world are willing to take a lot of shit just to hold on to a job. But if you ask anyone the simple question: “Why are doing this work?” they will normally give you some sell-out answer like “because it’s my job” or “because I need to pay the bills”. Now, for me, these are pretty hollow and non-meaningful answers as normally you should hear something more like “because this work is like crack to me” or “because when I do this work I feel like I’m being given head by Angeline Jolie while riding a unicorn“.

Are you still with me? Stop getting agitated I’m getting to the point!

Mmmm carrots

Mmmm carrots

The reason why people stay in these jobs and are  happy not to jumping for joy when they think about work is all due to have a constant view of the future. You see many people tell themselves, “It might not be fun now, but if I work hard for this company they will give me a raise, more holiday, a company car and hey I may even be able to pay Angeline Jolie to get down and dirty…”. And this is it, we are willing to accept shit in our lives just for the security of that chance at gaining something better. But may be 5, 10, may be even 20 years later you will look back after going through all that anguish to find out that what you have gained was not what you thought it would be. That massive and exhaustive journey you made to get to that “green grass” was simply not worth it and you feel like you’ve somehow you’ve been cheated or deceived.

Another example can be found in that scary and taboo of a word: consumerism. OOOOooOoooohh… that’s right I’m gonna crack open that old chestnut and before you start screaming HIPPY or COMMUNIST have a nice warm cup of shut the f*** up and listen:

I was listening to a LondonReal podcast yesterday where a salesman was explaining the concept of being a successful salesman. The podcast was great but there was one thing that made me cry in agony with anger when he said: “a good salesman gets you to understand that the product they are selling is something that you didn’t know that you needed” which is basically manipulation in it’s finest form really. Need is a strong word but you seem to hear it so often attached to random crap. For example some people might say “We need a bigger fridge” but if you ask why they’ll probably say “well we’re earning more money now so we can afford more food and more kids and have more people over and more… more…more…”. This is just stupid! You are facilitating the need with other things in your life that aren’t imperative to have at all!
I guess my rebuttal to this type of need is that if your life was fine before you had this need and if you wouldn’t have found out about this product, you wouldn’t be any unhappier or different then you are now. All you’re doing is thinking the grass is so much greener with all those ice tea makers, dishwashers, fast cars, massive houses and other junk when you would be completely fine without them. I’m not saying that any if these things are nice, all I’m saying is you don’t need them all and may be just be happy with what have already!

Now I could give you more examples (e.g. relationships, war, etc…) but I think I’ll leave that for later down the line or I may risk overcooking your brain (and mine). But I will leave you with an amazing quote:

Alan Watts , a philosopher in the 70s, talked about this concept that has resonated in me since I heard it:

… they made you miss everything by expectation. Look at the people who live to retire… We thought of life by analogy with a journey, with a pilgrimage , with a serious purpose at the end… but we missed the point the whole way along: It was a musical thing and you were supposed to sing or to dance while the music was being played.

Pretty powerful words if you stop and think about them, I guess all I’m trying to say is to stop always looking for that next best thing because when you really dig deep and look within you will find that the grass you’re standing on is green enough.

Till next time!

The Grad Rambler

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As this is my first blog post ever and I have no idea what I’m doing, I guess I’ll start off by simply saying: Hello Readers!

Hmmm… well I guess you want to know who the hell I am and why on Earth you should keep reading not head over to Facebook or that video cat in pajamas playing the piano. Well to be honest that video sounds hilarious and Facebook well… I’m sure you can put off reading your friends status updates ranging from the “I love cereal!” to “Don’t you just hate it when certain ‘best friends’ turn out to be your worst enemies?” (What the hell are people even meant to comment on this with??) and other crap.

Anyway I’ve had some thought and I’ve decided to remain anonymous for the time being for the reason that I will then be able to completely honest with anything I post without gaining any unwanted re-repercussions but I will tell you a bit about myself first so you can at least believe (or hoaxed into believing) that I’m not a crazy person who flings his feces at passers-by. So here goes:
I’m a recent graduate student in the UK where I achieved a Computer Science degree and then was propelled into jagged rocks of reality where I managed to obtain a Software Programmer job. I like games, girls and long walks on the beach (probably in that order).

I promise my next post will be much much more interesting with rainbows and unicorns coming out of it… or something along those lines.

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